Amanda Burns
When I Was Seventeen
I still dance in the light of day
Like I did when I was seventeen
And the world was just a dream to me.
The moon shines overhead
And part of me knows those times are dead
But the voices in my head urge me to sing anyway.
There’s nothing in reality
For someone like me to understand
Because nobody can see me anyway.
Daydreams dance in a silky rage
Promises don’t come with age
And the dreams I've left behind have changed.
The simplicity of the pouring the rain
Becomes my mantra for the pain
Everyone knows a little rain must fall.
But why’s it gotta fall so hard?
I miss the smell of the summer air
When it was us without a care
Trespassing in pitch black yards
Swimming in the blackest night
And me
Swearing change won’t find me.
I live in a constant state
Of who gives a shit and I wish I did
Stuck in the middle of who I am and who I want to be.
A brilliant moon shines overhead
The kind that used to get me wet.
I watch the stars that should have been
Proof those years have come and went
But to me
They’re just as pretty as I want to be.
I dance in the pouring rain
And wish that I were seventeen
When it was okay to be hesitant
Maybe even terrified
Of the world I know is set to burn me alive.
So I close my eyes and sing that song
And I know it won’t last long
One day the rain won’t fall
And I’ll be hot and tired of it all
And praying for the sun to shine on me.
But until then
I still dance in the light of day
Just to pretend I’m still the same
Stupid and seventeen
Even now, the world is still a mystery to me.
By Amanda Burns